Monday, August 11, 2008
There is no reason to read this!!!
This past couple of weeks has been a struggle for me. Do you ever have those weeks where you feel like you are doing everything half hearted? I have had problems with that the past 2 weeks. Poor Spencer, he has had to put up with me being frustrated, sad, grumpy, stressed, TIRED, you name it! I am currently working 51 hrs a week and have had problems getting my priorities straight. I was getting everything done but not as good as I would like. I LOVE my job!! Recently it became a struggle getting up every morning at 5:00. I felt dead every afternoon. I LOVE my calling. I have felt like I have been just going through the motion and not reaching out to the Young Women on a personal level. I LOVE working out and training!!! I am having problems being motivated. I have a triathlon this weekend and have not gone swimming since my last one or biked in the past 3 weeks. I have ran every once in a while at a SLOW pace. I just feel like I don't have time and I am to tired. I LOVE reading my scriptures. I have been reading them but not focusing. I find myself falling asleep and always in a hurry. I LOVE my Savior! I have been really trying to remember he knows me best! He has plans for me and I need to live by his time table not mine. I have vented to Spencer and actually become very emotional. It makes me so frustrated! I know I can get it all in but I had to figure how to do it ALL my BEST! I decided to try to change my mind frame. I am trying to focus on what I am doing at that second and not what else I need to do that day/week. This week has started off great and is going to be as good as it can be without Spencer here. He flew out tonight to California for a work conference. I am already missing him. Anyways, thanks for letting me vent. I know I will figure it out and that things will work out perfect. I love to be busy and will work it out.
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4 comments:
I am with you!! Ok... except for the part where you are super busy, because I'm not busy at all these days. But I truly struggle with the fact that I am not doing my best. I hate only doing things half way - but find myself doing that all of the time. It does amaze me when I see how active you are though. You may not be doing your best at EVERYTHING, but I'm sure you are doing pretty darn good considering. Hope you have a great week!
so you are NORMAL, good to know!!! You are probably still doing all of those things better than me! I know how it is to not feel your best though (it's called pregnancy for me) that's why I hate being pregnant because physically I can't be who I want to be and I fall asleep reading my scriptures too because I'm always so tired, it can be very very frustrating!!! Hang in there!
EXCEPT.. I'm NOT pregnant!
Thanks for the 93 minute conversation last night. It was MUCH needed. And I think we are with eachother on the frustrations from this post. I'm with ya girl! It was great talking and now I cant wait to come help you with vball when I come down. I will let you know when I decide. Love you!!
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